This Is Heaven To Me

THIS IS HEAVEN TO ME

By: Michelina, Grade Four

When you go to heaven the first thing you will do is go to the Gates of Heaven. You will then go into a palace and see God. Heaven looks like the sky on Earth but mostly it is white clouds. The gates are golden and have a sign on them that reads HEAVEN. At night time in Heaven it’s never dark. When you feel tired you put your hands in a machine next to your cloud and your hands tingle. You get recharged and you’re not tired anymore.

God is very big and he is waiting for you inside the Gates of Heaven with the Head Angel. God has brown hair and blue eyes. He has a very, very deep voice! He says to you, “Hello! I’ve been expecting you. You will be here forever. You have earned yourself the right to live here. You will be able to earn your wings by being sent to Earth. You will be a guide there. After you have taken care of this person for a long time you will be able to earn your wings! Here we go!”

God takes you down to Earth and makes you go into someone so you can watch the person. After five years of watching this person you get your wings so you can jump out of the person. Then you go up to Heaven.

When you live in Heaven you live on fluffy white clouds. When you want something all you have to do is snap your fingers around and you get it. The best thing about Heaven is that you get to eat whatever you want.

The person that you most want to meet in Heaven is God because you’ve been waiting your whole life to meet him. In Heaven you can do anything you want (except something bad). If you want to see your dead pet then all you do is spread your wings and go down through the universe and then through your galaxy and you will find your pet in the stars!

If I could talk to someone who is in Heaven now I would want to talk to my great-grandmother Michelina. I would like to meet the person I was named after. I would like to know what she looks like, what her voice sounds like and what her personality is. I think she was a nice person on Earth. I think she can see me now in Heaven.

As long as you are a good person you can go to heaven and have eternal life forever. It is so simple, don’t you think so? I do.

Theatre Survey

Theatre Survey

LAST SHOW ADDED TO YOUR RESUME:
Carnival - Princess Olga

LAST SHOW YOU AUDITIONED FOR:
A Midsummer Nights Dream, Shakespeare

DID YOU GET IN:
Yes! :-D

LAST SONG YOU USED AT AN AUDITION:
Vanilla Ice Cream, from the show She Loves Me

FAVORITE THEATRE (VENUE):
I really like IUP's theatre.

FAVORITE MUSICAL:
I have to pick one?

FAVORITE PLAY:
This week? Hmmm...

FAVORITE ROLE YOU'VE PLAYED, AND FROM WHAT SHOW?
I really liked Annie in Over the Tavern.

FAVORITE ROLE OVERALL THAT I WOULD LOVE TO PLAY:
Christine - Phantom of the Opera
Kathy -The Last 5 Years
Eliza - My Fair Lady
Laura - The Glass Menagerie
Connie - Barefoot in the Park
Harper - Angels in America
Hermia - Midsummer Nights Dream
Maria - Sound of Music

SUPERSTITION:
I pray before I go on stage or I can't do it. Also, shaking my hands out like crazy, hair spraying my hair, touching up make-up last minute, asking someone if I look okay...etc.

YOUR GOAL IN SHOW BUSINESS:
Get paid and be part of something excellent, not just passable. To do an amazing job. To change lives through theatre. To succeed in the art of being an actress, not just a performer.

FAVORITE DIRECTOR:
That I've worked with? Biff Barron and Dave Newhart


WHAT WAS YOUR VERY FIRST SHOW?:
Alice in Wonderland

HAVE YOU EVER HAD A DANCE SOLO?:
AHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA...if you count the hip wiggle thing I did in Carnival or that bed swaying in Lucky Stiff 'dancing'.

HAVE YOU EVER HAD A SINGING SOLO?
Mmmhmm

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN THE LAST PERSON TO TAKE A BOW?
Indeed.

NAME A SHOW YOU'VE DONE MORE THAN ONCE:
Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat

HAVE YOU BEEN TO NEW YORK?
Twice.

HAVE YOU BEEN TO LA?
Nopers.

WHAT'S THE SCARIEST PART OF AN AUDITION?:
Waiting to go in and audition, or waiting for the cast to be announced.

WHAT'S THE BEST PART OF AN AUDITION?:
All of it. It's exhilarating.

NAME A SHOW YOU WOULD NEVER DO AGAIN:
I'd do any show again for the experience, even if I couldn't stand the show itself. Why miss an opportunity to gain a new insight of the theatre?

NAME A SHOW YOU COULD DO FOR YEARS:
Again, I'd do any show for years if I had the opportunity. But probably Mrs. Bob Cratchit's Wild Christmas Binge or Lucky Stiff.

NAME A PERSON YOU'D LIKE TO WORK WITH AGAIN:
There are way too many people to list here.

WHAT ARE YOU AUDITIONING FOR NEXT?
Golgonooza.

HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN PERFORMING?:
Since I was 10 years old.

DO YOU CARRY YOUR HEADSHOTS AROUND WITH YOU?
No, I need to get some professionally done.

DO YOU KEEP IN TOUCH WITH PAST CAST MEMBERS?:
Only ones I like.

ON A SCALE OF 1-10, HOW IMPORTANT IS GETTING PAID?:
1. I don't care. It's what I love, it's my passion, it's what I was made to do. If I happen to get paid for it, that's awesome.

SOMETHING EMBARRASSING OR UNEXPECTED THAT HAPPENED TO YOU WHILE ON STAGE?:
Once, I spilled soda EVERYWHERE. Another time, I had water spit out onto me. Another time, I had to drink something quickly on stage and it was some sugary sweet stuff - something we never used before and it coated my throat so by the end of the song I couldn't get the last notes out and the other actor on stage with me had to cover my butt. Oh! And, I had a snake trying to choke me. That was neat.

WHAT IS YOUR MOST MEMORABLE PERFORMANCE?
I don't know that I could narrow it down to just one performance.

WHO IS THE MOST DIFFICULT PERSON (ON STAGE OR OFF) THAT YOU HAVE EVER WORKED WITH?:
Like I'm gonna say here...haha. Nice try.

EVER BEEN NAKED ON STAGE?:
No way. No one would pay to see that.

WHO OR WHAT IS YOUR GREATEST INSPIRATION OR INFLUENCE?:
Oh, I love Audrey Hepburn. And Kathrine Hepburn. And Deborah Karr. And Idina Menzel.

BEST PROFESSIONAL SHOW(S) YOU'VE SEEN?
Hairspray, original cast, NYC April 2005

BEST COLLEGE SHOW(S) YOU'VE SEEN:
Like I can answer that in an unbiased way.

BEST COMMUNITY SHOW(S):
Gosh. Not sure...

BEST HIGH SCHOOL SHOW(S) YOU'VE SEEN?
Not to be partial, but North Allegheny does a really good job with their shows.

ON STAGE, HAVE YOU EVER...

BEEN KILLED?:
No

BEEN DRUNK?:
Yup yup!

PLAYED SOMEONE HALF YOUR AGE?
Mmm...no.

PLAYED SOMEONE TWICE YOUR AGE?:
Not yet.

CRIED?:
Yes, oh heavens yes.

FIRED A GUN?
No

DRIVEN A CAR?
On stage?? Say what!?

BEEN IN A DREAM SEQUENCE?:
Yuppers. 'Woof woof!'

BEEN KISSED?:
Once.

Thanksgiving.

Well, it's Thanksgiving break! My laundry is done, my bags are packed, my nails are done, my room is clean (that's a lie), and I'm waiting for my mom and little brother to come and pick me up and whisk me away to Philadelphia for some quality family time.

They're only four hours late.

I should be doing something productive, like reading or writing an essay or memorizing for acting class. But no. I'm updating this instead. Isn't that productive?

Here's a little do-dad. Enjoy:

Laying on the bottom bunk
The red glowing clock burns the time onto my retinas
1:56am
I'm in between that place of wakefulness and dreams
And I'm talking to you about God and drinking and love
You're smiling and playing with my hair
You know how much I love that
I'm staring you in the eye
And we're promising each other never to make that mistake again
We're whispering words of intangible sights
We're screaming out loud
Our thoughts are flying into the nighttime air
And I watch as they float around the crown of you head
The fresh air blows in through the open window
And it's the only thing I can think of....
I kiss you.






Happy Thanksgiving, everyone! Eat lots of turkey!

Secrets.

There is a whisper of a word
spoken loudly and
absurd as it sounds, one
can never be sure be--
(careful who you trust)
--cause it seems as though this rumor might
be based on truths.
Promise me, promise me, you won’t
breathe a syllable of what
I’m about to tell you,
if it’s kept quiet it never
happened. Between those
sheets of sweeter than chocolate
love forever, more than wakeful
sleep, we shared a secret
and a promise I couldn’t keep.

You and Your Contradictions.

You have no idea and you have every inkling.
You are on your toes and you are totally relaxed.
You don't know who it is and you speak their name clearly.
You are lost and you are found out.
You know the time is not right, and I cannot talk but we are still on the phone.
You cannot dance and you are swinging to the music.
You are all alone and you are right next to me.
You stand up tall and you are crumbling to the ground.
You think but you have shut down.
You cannot play and you are tossing the ball.
You refuse to speak above a whisper and you are screaming at the top of your lungs.
You sing something pretty and you do not know the notes.
You hate the sunshine and you refuse to play in the rain.
You close your eyes and you can see everything.
You smile and you let the tears roll.
You tap on the keyboard but you have forgotten the words.
You hug your stuffed animal and you say you have grown.
Your stomach hurts and you run harder still.
You claim you are not right and you hate that I agree with you.
You claim to see light but all you talk about are shadows.
You think you are listening and you cannot hear me.
You say that I have killed you yet you are holding the knife.



Just random stuff, nothing good or meaningful this time. I thought I'd type something emo and not creative out while I had a minute, haha. ;-)

Did You Know That Your Glove Size Is The Same As Your Shoe Size? It Is The Truth...

"Oh my gosh," a camper exclaimed. "Miss Emily, Miss Emily! My foot! It's bigger than my hand!" I loved teaching four to eight year old theatre campers for that reason. "Yeah, Riley," I replied, "it sure is." She examined her hand, which was resting peacefully on her foot until this discovery. Placing her fully extended hand on the bottom of her flip flop, she tilted her head to the left, and then to the right, trying to take in this mind-blowing, life-changing observation. She pulled her sister's hair and said, "Maive, look at this for a minute."

Riley was absolutely mezmorized by the simple fact that her foot, was indeed, larger than her tiny little hand. Maive, being three years younger, didn't seem as fazed by this little known fact. She continued chewing her Goldfish and sipping her sister's canteen of juice every once in a while. However, Reily's gram crackers lay forgotten by the Arts and Crafts table, as she found different ways to place the palm of her hand against the heel of her foot. Soon, she decided that things might change if she adjusted the way she sat. So, the next time I turned around, Riley was on her back, her feet bent backwards next to her ears (a position I'm not sure any human with the correct amount of bones and joints can accomplish safely), gently resting on top of her hands.

"Miss Emily," she demanded, sitting upright. "Why has no one informed me about the size of my feet? " I explained that everyone, basically, had hands that were a bit smaller than their feet. She did not accept this readily at all. "No," she said, "I think that I must have been born with a disease of 'Rather-us Large-mon-ious Toes-eys Syndrome', and when the doctor told my mommy that I was going to be born that way, her and daddy cried and begged him to say that it wasn't really true and that he was making it up but he said it was the truth and it was real. And then I was born and they decided they would never tell me that I was doomed to live the rest of my life with gianormous feet and itty bitty hands! And now that I've discovered it, they're going to send me off into a spaceship! With lots of other people who have big feet! And then I won't be able to play the Great Bear in our show! And then what will we do, Miss Emily? Can you call the aliens and write me a note saying I can't go on the spaceship with the other big feet people until after camp is over? Please?"

I said we could write it right now, if she wanted to. She went to get me a crayon and some pink construction paper to write her excuse letter to explain her absence to the aliens. As I watched her re-tell this story to poor, unsuspecting Maive, I thought to myself:

"Well, we are at theatre camp."

In ten years, we'll see her on Broadway, playing some sort of dying and dramatic swan, I'm sure.

Over The Tavern

COMTRA THEATRE PRESENTS

By Tom Dudzick
Directed by Dave Neuhart

By Special Arrangements With The William Morris Agency

Go back in time to Buffalo, New York in 1959 and join the Pazinski family as Rudy, the youngest of four childrent, confronts his doubts about Catholicism and family dynamics. This heart-warming story will amuse but also provoke thought as the family lives day to day life in their apartment "over the tavern".

Meet the Pazinskis':

Rudy: Matthew W---

Ellen: Annette Q----

Chet: Tom L-----

Annie: Michelina P------

Eddie: TJ S------

Georgie: Josh B------

And their favorite nun:

Sister Clarissa: Donna M----

SHOW DATES: August 4, 5, 10*, 11, and 12th at 7:30 p.m. (*Thursday performance)
Call for tickets!

PLEASE NOTE: While people age 10 and older will enjoy this show, there is some language that may not be suitable for all theatergoers.

Wating for the Next Big Thing

Waiting For The Next Big Thing

I’m from the North Hills, which is twenty minutes or so outside of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. It is suburbia, folks, and you can’t get away from it. It is not the country, but definitely not the city either. And at age nineteen, I am stuck here like a piece of chewing gum in my little brother’s hair. It can be pretty, the grass and the trees and the strip malls. But one tends to get bored easily, so I rely on my ‘people-watching’ abilities. I know you have heard of ‘bird-watching’, so I can compare ‘people-watching’ to ‘bird-watching’. I sit down in a restaurant, a store, on a bench, in a public restroom, and notice how people act. I hear amazing love stories and horrible tragedies. I meet a bunch of people that have no story, besides the one I supply. You would be amazed at the type of inhabitants of this area.

I was in Starbucks yesterday, and I was going about my people-watching, as usual. Behind me was a group of middle school students who were enjoying a celebratory breakfast with their classmates before the last day of school.

“And then SHE said to me that it didn’t matter what we did so long as we did it, and I told her she better chill because it’s the last week of school and then she retracted her claws!”

The group of three girls and one boy laughed. A second boy joined the group and was greeted with a ‘hey, hottie!’ He wasn’t that attractive. I was watching these thirteen-year-olds sitting around, putting up their masks and pretending they were greater and more secure than they really were. When the parental units entered the scene, reminding them of their commitment to one final day of school before three months of freedom – the seventh graders blushed with embarrassment. How dare their mother act like she KNOWS her son and his friends? How embarrassing. Total social suicide. What a way to start the summer.

The business men on the couch next to them hardly noticed the mother’s social blunder. “It’s hard,” the thirty-something man in a navy blue suit explains to his elder, who dawns a gray blazer. After a sympathetic nod, the younger man continued, “this constant hiding and lying and denying that there is anything wrong. You would think someone would come up with a ‘no strings attached’ system for carrying on an affair.” The older man stared at him long and hard before asking in a quiet voice, “are you breaking up with me?”

A loud crash from the display table made the father of a sweet looking imp, cringe. He dragged his daughter, who looked to be just under schooling age, up to the front with one hand, while holding the remains of a broken mug in the other. “Hand the nice lady the money, Olivia.” His impatience could not be masked by his sweet tone. Olivia started to cry and her father handed the cashier the money himself. He bought her a cookie, told her accidents happen, and at least there was no hot coffee in the cup like the LAST time she broke one. She laughed and hopped onto her father for a piggyback ride to the car.

There was one lone girl, who was almost a woman, sitting by herself at one of those very small round tables that barely fits two people, but Starbucks tries anyway, just to make it look like there is more seating. The result is a cluttered look, more than anything. She watched everything around her, and was taking mental notes. She was bored to tears and sucked into the other people’s lives that she had been watching, all at the same time. She drank an over-priced ice coffee, and looked as though she was waiting for the next big thing. No one spoke to her, though she made eye contact with everyone. They could feel her nonchalant stare. She should have been out having her own life, instead of living vicariously through others just to write it down later. Everyone sees her quietly observing their lives and no one speaks to her, no one invites her in, and no one knows why she is there. I know why she is there. She is there to build a character for a role she will play on stage some day. She is there to gain writing material. She is there to learn about her surroundings in ways others care not to. They know where they live, they wave hello to their neighbor, and never know their children’s teachers. She does not want to become that. She wants to know the people that live around her so personally, she could finish their sentences. She wants them to read this, and see that they are noticed. She wants to break the mold.

And all the while, these caffeine consuming, time managing, private lives citizens of the North Hills, just twenty minutes outside of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, assume it’s just another day around town.

Old Letters And New Characters

I found this old letter to my fifth grade teacher. Her name is Mrs. Barbara Link and she was so cool. No one liked her, and she scared me, and one day I messed up a science project where you had to tape two ends of 2 lt. soda bottles together and plant seeds in one end and put air holes in the other...I put holes in both of my halves and thought there was no reparing it. I wrote her a note that said I messed it up, and please don't tell my mom. She wrote me a note back saying during recess I should talk to her. She helped me fix it and then I wrote her and she wrote me back whenever I needed to tell her something but was too scared. She really was a nice lady. Apparently, one day she tripped and fell on her stairs and slipped a disk. So her and I started writing back and forth, and in my ten-year-old mind I thought I was so cool, getting mail from someone older than me. Anyway, I lost her address when we moved from Philidealphia to Pittsburgh. I guess this letter never got into the mail.

Date: May 22, 1998

Dear Mrs. Link,

Hi! I have this strange feeling that all my letters have gotten lost on there way to you and they are half way across China by now. If you do however, get this letter by some miracle please write back! If for some reason, you can't, dictate to someone and get them to mail it for you! Now that I got that out o the way, today was Field Day today, and today was the hoop-off! I was on the white team. The score was 243 to 241. White only lost by two points! WAAAAAAA! It was so close. I made it to the Hoop-Off. Laura McC , Jessica H, an d I stood next to each other. Jess fell after 15 min. I felt so bad. Me and Laura (oops), Laura and I did allot of things while we were hooping, we said the Rosaries, TWICE! we saw a blimp that said 'Metlife' and Snoopy was on it! My knees hurts so much that I got down on my knees and hooped a the same time! Laura and I didn't drop our hoops when it was time, we flung are selves on the ground! I thought I'd never get up, but I did. Laura an d i won, there were 280 kids that started and 47 that made it through the hole thing, and Laura and I made it 47 instead of 45. I feel so happy to know I counted, literally!

Are you coming to the talent show and / or the 5th grade graduation? Pleeeeeeeeeease say yes. Well, what are you waiting for? Come on all you have to say is Y-E-S! We sold are house. We are moving out of are house on the 31st of July. Here is my new address:

- - - - Claridon Drive

- - - s Pa

1- - - -

I'm almost out of room! I will type as much more as I can. We had Young Author's Day. My illustration won for the front cover!!!!!!!!!!!! I was / am so excited. I don't want my computer to get mad at me so I'll have to cut it short.

Hope to hear from you soon,

Michelina

P.S.

My dad got a new Pontiac Grand Prix! It's black!

So I'm workin gin an assisted living home. I have been there a week now. I'm learning a lot about myself and others, I like working with other people (since I'm a people-person), I love to hear the residents stories, and I can pick my hours. However, it's twelve hour shifts (7am-7pm) and it's five days a week - sixty hours! The pay is decent, and I have things I need to start saving for, so that's a plus. But it's hard work. I have to help serve food, bathe, change diapars, answer call buttons, dress, and make sure there is no escaping of the residents. There are three units. The 'main level' (you're not allowed to say 'upstairs' because it's demeaning to those 'downstairs') is for people who can dress themselves, know what's going on basically, and are pretty coherent. The 'garden level' has two seperate units. 'Frail' is for those who are physically unable to do what they used to be able to do, and sometimes their minds aren't the best either. 'P.C.' or 'Politely Confused' is for those who's body is still functioning pretty well, but their minds are a little lost. Ok, a lot lost. P.C. is the most isolated unit, and if you go there, you're there alone. One staff person and 12 residents and three exits to watch. The only goot thing is that the doors have alarms and codes and anytime a door opens you have to type in the code to shut off the alarm. It's pretty high tech, I have to get my fingerprint scanned to clock in and out of work.

I had worked in Frail (where there are two staff members down there at a time) as well as Main level, again, two people. And then on Sunday, the supervisor sends me to P.C. -- that's a death sentence. She said the night crew person would tell me what to do and if I could do Main, I could do P.C. Fine. I go and the night crew person writes where everyone's room is, who's violent and not, who needs what kind of diapers, who tries to run...And then she leaves me. And I am all alone with twelve residents. All day, these people hear and see ghosts of their past. Some more than others. For three days I spoke nonsense and lies, and it was not easy. It's very sad, they beg me to let them leave, they want to know where they are, when they're going home, and they ask why I am doing this to them. I started to write down some of what I could.

Joan

I met Joan. Joan doesn't know what's going on. She points and speaks about things that aren't there, asks me questions about who knows what, and sees me as someone she knows or once knew. She constantly looks at me after complimenting me and then says "are you staying? you need to stay, you and your sisters NEVER stay long, I only see you once a year..."

"I couldn't find her." "That's okay, she'll be back tomorrow." "Is he alright?" "Yes." "You're beautiful, God you're beautiful." "You're beautiful, too." "I love your dress." "Thank you." "You're beautiful." "Thank you, so are you." "You don't have to be, you're so good.""Thank you." "I have to go to school." "It's Saturday, the teachers won't be there." "They're coming up nicely." "I think so."

Bill

Bill is a war vet. The other day he told me he was dying and that he was shot 'yesterday' and he was dying and needed to see a doctor right away. He said he was bleeding everywhere. I told him that was sixty-some years ago, and he's fine now. Apparently he was shot three times and he still has a bullet in his head. He called me a dumb something or other for not believing him and serving food like nothing was the matter.

"Do you work?" "Yes, I work here." "Here?" "here?" "Yes." "Oh." "And I like the theatre, I'm an actress." "Are you? What one?" "What show am I in? ...*pause to make something up* My Fair Lady." "Did they give you the sweater already?" "Yes...so are you going to sit down for me at the dinner table, now?" "No kiddin?" "No, no kidding. :-) " "I want you to know, for your information, I don't have my drivers license." "Ok, I'll keep that in mind, thanks for making me aware." "I told you I can't drive! I'm 93 years old! I drove to mass and shut off the ignition in the parking lot and that was it." "Wow. That's amazing." "The carnival's on KDKA now, just started." "What are you doing now?" "Whoever I can." "Oh."

He was coloring with us, I kept hit picture. He just wrote:

"The liffof I I Rifof didn't I Do I do not driv Seve"

Joe

Joe is the most violent. Joan likes to hold hands with anyone who will hold hers, and you have to watch that Joe doesn't hold her hand, because he'll squeeze until he crushes it and he gets very angry and fustrated. He doesn't speak often but when he does...well, he's a funny guy.

"No, no, Joe, you can't go out there." *run to the door*"Is that the flight?" "Yeah." "Oh." "But it's closed now." "oh, is it?" "Yes." "really?" "They told me so." "Oh." "Sorry." "That's alright." "Maybe tomorrow." "Okay." "Let's go back." "Alright then."

***

"Please let go of her hand." "I told you we can't pay you!" "This isn't the right one. (Joan)" "Now, I mean it!" "Joe, please let go, you're hurting her" "I KNOW I AM!" "This one is better." "I'm calling the supervisor." "JOE, LET GO OF HER! (supervisor)." "Come here, Joan, sweetie." "JOE, LET GO OF HER." *tears hands apart* *Joe raises his hand to strike me* "Don't. You. Dare."

It's interesting.

Cleaning - 2.0!

Well, now my brother has finally jumped on the cleaning wagon since we're getting out of here soon. And he found this poem that we both wrote. I don't know how long ago we wrote it, why we wrote it, to be honest: I don't even remember writing it, but apparently we did because it's in my handwriting. I'm not even sure why I'm sharing this besides the fact that it is absolutely ridiculous and something only my brother and I would do in our spare time...Perhaps during a day when we were sent to our rooms and had nothing better to do. So many questions surrounding the creation of this inspired poetry, and no way to answer them. Here it is, folks. Genius at it's best. I swear this was created due to our father's contribution to the gene pool...

I Have A Butt..

By Mark & me

I have a butt that's made of tin!

Nobody knows what shape it's in!

Every time I sit down,

my butt makes a sound!

I have a butt that's made of steel!

Every time I poop it comes out teal!

Every time that I go potty,

I can't believe it comes outta my body!

I have a butt that's made of gold!

I'm not sure exactly how old.

Every time I pull down my pants,

someone asks: 'How much was that?'

I havea butt that's made of flesh!

I think it's a real mess!

Every time I take my seat,

My butt goes "squish",

It's really neat!

I guess it's good that my brother and I even th ought to write a poem....We could have been playing video games....

Right?

...Right?

*crickets chirp*

Well! Back to packing it is, then!

Stories and Dreams and a Night on the Town

I'm singing 'The Last 5 Years', I really love it. Thanks Miss Katherine for introducing me so long ago!

My friend and I were talking online a few nights ago, and we both were in a writing mood. So we gave each other topics (haha, actually, the topic was I wrote about him and he wrote about me in some fictional sense). So here's his, he wrote two very short ones:

TITLE

Alicia was a strong-willed brunette. She was Italian and she was damned proud of it. She was also a bit of an attention whore, but hey, that comes with being a theater major.

Anyway, one sunny day Alicia stepped outside of her dorm and stretched her arms. A shadow fell over her, and she was suddenly trampled by a Tyrannosaurus.

The whereabouts of the large carnivorous dinosaur are currently unknown. Perhaps one day the prehistoric reptile will be brought to justice.



Stargazing

At 8:00 the curtain opens and Alicia starts singing the show's first ballad. It's 8:15 before Paul hurries down the aisle and takes a seat in the front row. He hopes the actress doesn't notice.

Outside, the stars this night are especially bright. Paul, who was walking to the theater, had slowed down to admire them. He was fascinated by stars, always had been. He had given up wishing on them a long time ago, but seeing so many of the white pinpricks still put his mind at ease.

The girl on the stage is a star. Paul watches Alicia with her dark hair pulled back and her green eyes flashing up toward the stage lights. Her eyes flicker down to him for a moment and swing back up to the ceiling. He squirms in his seat.

Earlier there had been a fight with Alicia, harsh words yelled over the phone. Paul crosses his arms and repeats the words of her song in his head as her music flows over him like the stage light. She hadn't spoken to him since the argument.

He hadn't meant anything of the things he had said. Initially he had wondered why he even cared, they weren't even dating. Seeing her shimmer on the stage, he knew how foolish that was.

Watching the stars on the way to the theater, Paul had wondered if wishes could come true. He clenched his fists and made one, then bowed his head and walked faster until his legs hurt.

When the show ends, Paul waits for Alicia backstage, unsure of how she'll react when she sees him. She delights him by rushing to him and taking his arm.

Outside the sky is still cool and clear. Alicia sees his head turned upwards and squeezes his hand.

"How can there be so many stars in the sky?" she asks him.

Paul looks down at her green eyes. In the darkness, in the street light, she is ethereal, musical. Might she fade away like the melody of a lingering song? Maybe that's what makes her so beautiful.

"Well?" she asks.

"I think," Paul says, "it's because there's a star out there for everyone."

Close curtain.

And mine - I'm long-winded:

Like In Movies

The rain poured from down from the iron gray sky, as if God had decided to dump His vast oceans on the suburbia below. It's the kind of rain you could be kissed in, she said. Like in movies, you know? When they had been warm and safe, watching it from her bedroom window, he nodded and smiled. He loved those kinds of movies. She was a hopeless romantic. He was a dreamer. They would be a good pair if they could ever get their timing right. wasn'trently, her heart wasn't there and his timing wasn't right. Again. He sighed and looked up. Very funny, he thought. Whether it was a prayer to God or just to tdidn'tarma of the day, he didn't know. He continued to walk down the street in his hooded sweatshirt and jeans, wondering what had brought him here and how he could have changed the events leading up to this moment.

***

Months ago he had been sitting in a class he was forced to take for his psychology major. He hated every moment of it and she was bored out of her mind. Why are we even in this class? It's pointless. I could teach it better than this moron, she had said to her friend across the aisle. He came back to earth from the momentary "space-out" session. The teacher had that affect on a several students. He looked at her and had to agree. If you were teaching, we'd probably pass our tests. Half the class couldn'tling right now, so you couldn't hurt anything. She informed him that she was doing just fine, thank you very much. He remembered seeing a lot of test grades on her desk that had set the curve for most of the exams he scrapped by on. After a few more classes filled with small-talk, and poor marks, she was tutoring him.

***

I just don't get it. My brain doesn't work this way. He threw his book across the rdoesn'tnd stared at her. This doesn't have anything to do with helping people, that's all I want to do. And I sure as hell won't get any stories from it. She laughed lightly and teased him. A creative writing major and a psychology major? And you can't find anything creative in all this technical mumbo-jumbo? Come now, there must be a story here somewhere. He rolled his eyes; he didn't care about this junk anymore. She could see himwasn'ttting down; the information just wasn't processing at two in the morning. She would have to try a different way. It was time to be bold; after all, his grade was at stake here. Or so she kept telling wasn'telf to convince her head that she wasn't just following her heart illogically. Not that logic and the heart have ever mixed. Here, look at it this way. She bent down and gathered his scattered notes and crumpled text book. If the stimulus is a kiss, what would the natural reaction be? He didn't know, he didn't even understand the question. And this was supposed to be based off of the basics! He shrugged and looked to her, waiting for an answer. She leaned towards him and gently kissed his lips. He kissed back. After a moment, she pulled away. Laughing, she remarked in a tone she used only when teaching, That's correct... That would be the stimulus...and the response. Smiling, he leaned in towards her and whispered I think I'm getting it now.

***

A whirlwind of dating and laughter, with a pinch of good movies and sweet moments made the remaining time at school fly by. Summer was going to start and they lived far enough away that it would be a problem when neither of them had access to a car. I'm sorry, I just can't do it. I want to, but I can't. She was on perched on the edge of his futon, crying and explaining how she really wanted to be with him for the summer, but bewouldn'tof the way her heart worked, she knew it couldn't end well if they did it that way. He couldn't understand it. This can work, love makes it work. If it's supposed to be, it will be alright. His words usually comforted her, his dreams and his fervent, passionate belief about what was ‘meant to be’, but that day they just broke her heart more. She wasn’t being reasonable. Hadn’t they been through so much together? How could a little thing like distance separate them? We can still talk, online, on the phone, email, whatever. But - we're going to be just friends this summer. I want to be your friend. When we come back next fall, we'll see where it goes from there, but please, respect this. Can we just... be friends? He gave in. It was better than losing her completely. She stood up, gave him a kiss on the cheek and a hug, and walked out the door. He listened to its' quiet click, signifying she had shut it behind her and he was unable to move. Funny, the way the heart works.

***

It was just going to be a visit. To see what would happen, to be friends and meet up. Her parents were at work, he had the car for a few days. She wasn't expecting him. He wasn't even sure if this was the right house. He ran towards the shelter of the front porch as rain drops exploded on the pavement around him. Above the rush of water and wind, he heard the doorbell chime faintly. A dog barked and ran towards the front door. She mentioned she had a black lab once, when they were walking through a park and saw a little girl in a yellow sundress walking a golden retriever that would have been taller than him if it stood on its hind legs. The wind blew harder and he remembered he was on a wet porch, not in a sunny park. The lock snapped open, the door swung backwards, and she squealed, rushing at him and wrapping him in a tight hug. You're here! I can't believe you're here right now! He inhaled, drawing in the smell of her hair - roses and mint. She led him inside, closing the door on the ferocious weather and gave him a grand tour of the house. They ended in her bedroom, which was cramped and full of childhood memories. Pictures of her younger self, key chains, collages, and old birthday cards filled her bulletin boards. Posters of the Backstreet Boys, Winnie the Pooh and Psalm 139 were plastered onto her ceiling, and could be seen reflecting in the gigantic dresser's mirror. They sat on her bed, talking about what they had been doing with their time off, mentioning regrets of not keeping in touch as much as they promised. He kissed her. She kissed back. Stimulus and response, he thought, grididn'tg.

***

She didn't mean it. She said it, but she didn't mean it. Well if that's the way you feel..., he wasn't about to stay there if she was going to say things like that. He started it, but she just took it to a new level. She was already crying. I hate when we fight, I can't stand this. Why did you come here at all? He can't remember what started this particular argument; they were having such a nice time in her room, talking and remaining. He lashed back at her. The cruelty and unthinkinwouldn'ts pushed emotionswouldn'tcalate. She asked him to leave. He said he wouldn't come back; he wouldn't talk to her anymore. That's your loss. Not mine. She refused to sit there and have her heart stepped on. It was hard enough to decide that their friendship was more important than their relationship two months ago. I had to make that decision; he was blind to what it would mean if we carried on the way we had. Now he decided to pull this crap? I don't have the strength. She shook her head as he walked out of the room. He was boiling mad. Their biggest problem was also their greatest attraction to each other; they similar in love and tempedidn'the stood at the top of the stairs as he slammed the door behind him. He didn't go to his car, he needed to think, needed to walk, needed to go and not look back and not worry about the consequences for a minute. Can the world give me just five minutes? Please!? Lightening struck, and he could hear her mutt barking at the sound of electricity's pulsing boom echoing across the neighborhood.

***

He had been walking around the residential area chock-full of nicely placed cult-de-sacs and housing plans for sixty-three minutes. A spider web of beautiful two story houses complete with three car garages and white picket fencing led him back to the top of her street. The rain water soaked through his hoodie and he could feel small rivers squelching in his shoes. As he approached her house, he day dreamed of ringing her doorbell a second time and admitting his mistakes. He stood on the lawn of her house for a moment. He was hoping she would run out and kiss him, like girls did in movies, while the rain fell down around them, closing them off into a world of their own. He could make her dinner and she could dry his clothes and they could stay up talking until dawn. He raised his head to sky, feeling the water washing away the last remains of anger and frustration. His eyes fall on her bedroom window, and he sees the curtains swinging back into place, as though just a moment ago someone had been watching from behind them. After he finally backed his jalopy out of the driveway, he slowly passed her house, and at the last second he noticed her lying on the front lawn, staring at the sky. He stopped the car, and lay down next to her. After counting the one hundredth drop of rain to touch his skin, he inhaled deeply. He wanted to make it better, to say anything, to make her smile. His eyes focused intently on her face.

I'm sorry.

I know.

She reached for his hand, and he allowed his fingers to become entwined with hers, as they lay in the grass, staring up towards space.

So that's that. I need to make a file of all the stuff I write.

I had a strange dream this morning. Not last night, I woke up and saw it was morning, but decided to roll over and fall back asleep. I had my room all set up for me in Hickory Hall, where I'm going to be an RA next year. Except it was a hotel room. And Michelle and Jenny were there. I don't know what was going on but everyone from my circle at school was at the library - which was, ironically my old Andh school building. I talked to my friends, I did some stuff for residents...and then I starteAndo walk to the library under the facade of my high school. And it exploded...and so then I ran in to help people, and the downstairs was fine, only the upstairs was bad, and my grandmother (my dad's mom, who was a nurse for a while) was there and she told me to get this or that. I used her cell phone to call my mom and tell her I was fine but I had to help residents so I couldn't come home and I didn't know where anyone was besides Jen and Michelle. I was crying and helping people and my mom couldn't understand why I was so upset.

It was weird.

I woke up and I've been in a weird mood. So I'm singing musical songs.

Last Thursday someone came to visit. That was very fun. We went to the Andy Warhol Muesum. There was one room with silver balloons shaped like pillows (life size), and a bunch of fans blowing them around. It was very cool. There was this one picture I looked at and it was ambiguous and I kept trying to decide all the different things it could be. I asked him what he thought it was and when he said one of the things I had came up with, I had to smile. We took pictures on his phone and in one of the mini photo booth things you put three dollars into. Then we went to Station Square. Ate and talked and then stopped by Michelle's for Halyse's birthday.

Good times.

I kinda wish I knew what I was doing. But that's life.

We're moving in a week or two.

I have an audition on Sunday afternoon.

That's my story.

The end.

Cleaning

We've been cleaning our house, picking what we're keeping and what we're tossing because we're moving (not far, we're staying in the school district so that little Mark can be with his friends, etc). I can't believe how much stuff I have. I've trashed a LOT of it, and the rest I'm going to attemp give to Good Will. Anyone want a purple lava lamp?

I don't blame you.

I found two rather entertaining pieces of writing in my desk. The first is a list I wrote out to my mother about why I should be allowed to go over Michelle's house last year over Christmas break when my Dad was in the hospital. I did something or other to tick her off and I wasn't going to be allowed to go over and I'd have to sit with my mom in the waiting room or something, so I wrote her this to ask her if I could go...

Why I Would Like To Go To Michelle's Today

1. Because all of my imaginary friends are on vacation, so I should probably find my real ones out.

2. Because my lack of sleep could potentially cause myself, along with my easily influenced little brother, to become extremely hyper, thus...

3. Because I could become extremely loud and giggly

4. Because drawing four arrows on a piece of paper, taping them to the floor, and jumping on them just isn't the same as playing DDR.

5. Because I made a copy of the Toby Mac CD and it's a better alternative to a lot of Rap Michelle listens to. And besides...

6. What am I going to do with another copy of a CD I already have. Speaking of CD's...

7. Jen will be there and I have a CD for her too. Again...

8. What does one do with several copies of the same CD if they can't give them to their (real) friends?

9. Not to mention the fact that I haven't even seen Jen since she told us she was sick and

10. If I could just see her I'd know she was okay.

11. Because I don't like hospitals, even though the one Dad is in is nice, I really hate them.

12. Because I don't think I could handle concentrated worrying and imagining the negative for six hours straight.

13. Because when I need some space, I can't go over a friend's house for coffee or run over to church like you can and...

14. I've been with you and the rest of the family for 13 days...

15. Which is 412 hours...

16. Or 24, 720 minutes...

17. Also known as 1, 453, 200 seconds and...

18. That's a lot.

19. Because when else am I going to get to meet Michelle's boyfriend and let her know if he's okay or not? You said that it was important for your friends to like and get along with your boyfriend because...

20. People get married to their high school sweethearts...

21. And what better way for me to see if this guy is okay than to go and spend a whole day with him

22. Because you and dad said everyone should get one mistake a year without consequences, and in Feb. Was mine, but couldn't I take mine for 2005 now? It's only a few days away as it is.

23. Because Michelle, and Indu, and Halyse, and Jen, and them are real friends, not the fake kind of people who pretend to love you and be a friend but then turn around and hurt you, like a lot of kids I know at NA.

24. Because how many people did you know in high school who would love you for who you are, not hate you for who you're not?

25. Because if I actually took the time to write this you know that these people are really something special.

26. Because honestly, no one plays hide-and-go-seek as often as they should.

27. Because it feels good to be included

28. Because I'll miss out on memories

29. Because we're all going to leave in six months and then we'll have a hard time getting together after we go to college.

30. Because even Mary couldn't stay angry at Jesus when He was a kid

31. Because you know your true friends when they read the black board for you in gym because you can't see without your contacts and you took them out to swim

32. Because real love is un -conditional

33. Because I had enough sense to approach this in a mature manner after I cooled off

34. Because when your a bad dancer, you can play DDR, and laugh with your friends instead of being laughed at for looking dumb

35. Because Michelle and everyone else at the party lift you up instead of bring you down

36. Because you learn from experience and...

37. Because then I could learn how to be social with people I don't know because...

38. There are going to be some girls from Butler (Michelle's boyfriend)'s school I won't know and I'm painfully shy when I don't know anyone but because I'll know some people and they'll help me get over it

39. Because my hair is behaving today and not showing it would be a waste

40. Because I came up with 40 reason why, all of them are good, and no matter what, I love you and even though it doesn't mean anything to you, I'm still sorry.


Talk about Catholic/Italian guilt. I did get to go out and it was fun. I found that and thought 'I should post that', for whatever reason.

The other thing I found was a little more intellectual. It's a valley girl's take on Edgar Allen Poe's The Raven

One Night At Home

Once upon a time (note the original beginning!), a man was sitting alone in his house. Well, he like hears this noise and wonders what it is. However, since he's reading in front of the fire, trying to forget his lost love, he, y'know, pays no attention to it. He's afraid of strange noises, so he convinces himself that it must be somebody out WAY past curfew who's come to see him. Well, uh, he takes a deep breath, gets up from his chair, and slowly approaches the door, finally opening it. And he sees like NO ONE! After peering out into the darkness, and listening to the silence, he whispers, 'Lenore?' (She was the fox he was hittin' on.) Well, he gets no answer, so he like goes back inside. And now he hears a sound at the window! So he goes over to the aforementioned window and opens the shutter, not knowing what to expect: a guy with a gun? A weirdo? Who could know? Well, you'll never guess what it was: it was like this bird, all big and black, that just flew right in, right across the room, and landed on a statue he had in the room. Now you know about birds and statues, right? My man is getting really nervous now! So he says to the bird, "What's your name and why are you sitting on this statue in my room?" And the bird, who of all things could talk, goes, "Nevermore." Now the guy knows he heard the bird clearly, but he says to himself, "Self, what's up with this 'Nevermore' name?" Then he figures, "Hey, there've been so many others come and go in my life, I ain't sweatin' you, Dude. You'll be outa here soon, too." But our friend the bird hears him, and says, "Nevermore." Then the guy figures that this bird must've learned this "Nevermore" rap from like a previous owner, and all is chilll. He figures, "I'm all right with this; I wish Lenore could be here to see it!" The problem is, Lenore is gone and isn't about to be on no return flight, cause it's like The Big Gone! (She ain't breathin', man.) But since the bird is remidin' him of this lost filly, he asks it to stop. Guess what the bird says? Yep, "Nevermore." OK, OK. "Tell me this then," says our poor-just-sitting-there-minding-his-own-business-when-the1800's-version-of-a-phone-solicitor (that's the bird) came-to-interrupt-him-guy, "will I at least get to see her in heaven?" Now the bird is getting really nasty, 'cause once again h e replies, "Nevermore!" Well, that was the last French Fry in the bag, I mean, now the guy has had it! No more Mr. Niceguy! He tells the bird to get out, right down to the last feather! But the bird ain't budgin', as he says, "Nevermore." And to this day that bird is sitting there haunting the poor, sad, demoralized guy; a loser in the game of life; the end.


Well, I found it funny. But I'm a dork, so there you have it!

Have a spectacular day!

Freshman Year Of College: PWNED

Here are a few tidbits of things I'd like to say about college since I've gotten through my first year and a bunch of you who read this are getting ready to go to some university or another once fall comes around. Get ready for this, folks. It's long.

THINGS I'VE LEARNED AFTER FRESHMAN YEAR OF COLLEGE:

- You'll go into it either having a plan or having no idea what you're doing. I went into it with a plan. Around November, I changed my plan and you know what? That's ok. Have the guts to say to your parents: Mom, dad, I don't want to be a psych. major. I want to major in Theater and I want to stay at the campus I'm at all four years, not transfer after two.

- And if you have no idea what you want to do: that's ok too. Don't wait until your junior year to declare a major but don't rush into one and end up taking all the wrong classes when you realize what you REALLY wanted to do.

- When they tell you a final exam is cumulative: they're not just saying that for kicks and giggles. You can't study one night before a final and expect to get a good grade on it.

- Going to a branch campus doesn't suck, isn't something to be ashamed of, and doesn't mean you're incompetent.

- Join something AS SOON AS YOU GET THERE! Audition for a show or work backstage, join the newspaper, radio or TV station, literary magazine, campus ministries, international basket weaving team...SOMETHING! My best friends I met through the musical...God really blessed me that way.

- You'll fall for someone unexpected. You won't believe your heart when it tells you that you like that girl/boy...Believe it. They'll end up changing the way you look at people.

- Yup. It's true. People smoke, drink, and have promiscuous sex in college. And sadly, it's not uncommon, it's not made into a 'big deal'. That doesn't mean it's not, though.

- Skip the frat/sorority houses on weekends. Yes, there are some great people there: but on weekends when the Jungle Juice or Red/Blue/Purple Death come out, I'd say that the people you want to be with won't be around there anyway.

- And for the record: never drink anything with the name 'death' in the name. That can only end badly...I know a few people who can confirm that statement from experience.

- Anyone who pressures you to drink, have sex, or smoke something isn't your friend. I know people who do all three of those things (not simultaneously, as far as I can tell) but none of them have ever made me feel as if I had to do those things to stay friends with them.

- You'll be surprised how many people respect your virginity/sobriety/faith. While they might tease you about it, they'll also look you in the eye and respect you for it.

- Don't take 18 credits first semester. Don't do it. You don't have to. You have four years (or more!). I mean this: DO NOT TAKE 18 CREDITS FIRST SEMESTER. 12 is too little, 18 is too much...Start with 15. You can see how you handle that and grab more or less second semester. Did I mention that you should NOT take 18 credits first semester? Because I don't recommend it.

- Let me clear something up about the whole 'drink' thing. If you didn't pour it yourself, don't ingest it. Period. Date rape drugs exist, people use them, and that really bites...But it's true. I'm not saying that to scare you, I'm saying it because you ARE new at this school and you DON'T know anyone really well yet.

- Make eye contact and say 'hello' to people walking by. If you see someone sitting by themselves at a meal, go up to them and introduce yourself. Then ask if you can join them. Get to know them. Be nice to the cafeteria workers, custodial staff, etc. You are no better or worse than anyone.

- Your teachers are either 'Professor' or 'Doctor'...Not 'Mr./Ms./Mrs.' Get used to it. Even the teacher without a doctorate deserves to be referred to as professor. It's a respect thing.

- Just because you're good at a subject doesn't mean you can coast. You owe it to your professors, but even more to yourself to give it your all, even if it's easy. Don't give half-efforts on anything. You're better than that.

- Yes! You really can go to your 8am class in your pjs. No one's awake enough to care, anyway.

- Another student will be better than you at what you love. Learn from them and befriend them, don't automatically reject them or hate them because you're no longer the best.

- You have the right to disagree with a teacher. However, if you can't present your argument intelligently: forget it. You'll be shut down. They've been here longer, have heard it before, and don't take any crap.

- You don't HAVE to go to class. That's great, sort-of. You can choose to skip class if you want. Try to avoid it. When you look at how many times you actually have to be there, it's a lot less than high school and teachers do know when you show up and when you don't.

- Rahman Noodles, Facebook, and caffeine will be come staples in your life. Don't fight it.

- All-nighters are bound to happen, especially during finals week. Staying up until 6am studying for a Short stories In Context class is MUCH more fun when you're with other people. Group all-nighters are great...And if you make a 'no talking' rule, you get a lot more done.

- Chances are, you'll work your way into a close circle of 10 or 20 people and then have a bunch of friends outside of that group that you enjoy, but aren't 'family' like that close circle. Let me tell you what: you will date each other. You will date your best friend's ex-boyfriend. They will date your old crush. It's BOUND to happen when you are in such a close-knit group. Stay honest and don't talk behind anyone's back. Less drama happens that way.

- Gossip and rumors fly. Don't give into it if you can help. Listen but don't repeat information. You'll end up knowing the most about everyone and not hurting anyone.

- Getting a tutor for a class you have trouble in is a GOOD idea. Don't wait until a week before the final to get one. If you get a D on the first test, go to the Academic Support Center and sign up.

- Good Will and Salvation Army (Sal Val) beat the mall any day of the week.

- If someone breaks your heart, the best remedy I've found is: Cry to a friend, eat a bowl of ice cream, go to sleep. The next morning: dress up in the outfit you look best in and be the most outgoing and self confident person you can be.

- For every month you've been dating someone, you get one day of pouting. That's it. Take it, use it, and then move on. Someone else has had a crush on you the entire time, anyway.

- Shower. Brush your teeth.

- It's ok to blow off studying for an hour to have a snowball fight and get hot chocolate after. In ten years it won't matter what you got in Trig, but you will remember tackling your best friends in the snow.

- Pick your battles wisely. Some things are better if you just let them go, other things you have to speak up on. There's a fine line and I'll be damned if I've figured out the balance yet.

- The RA's are just doing their job. The walls in the dorms are paper thin and they can hear you when you say 'Oh GAWD, it's an RA...Hide the booze.' We're not deaf. I swear.

- Do three things that you'd never do if you were home.

- CALL YOUR MOTHER! She misses you. Once a month should do it.

- Check in with your younger/older siblings. The older one's can help you with the whole college transition deal and the younger one's can keep you updated on 'what's what' at home. Keep interested in their school work, and their life in general...It's ok to be friends with your kid brother. (My little brother and I's relationship has improved greatly since I've been at school).

- Inevitably, the computer will crash the night before the paper you've worked on for six hours is due. Get a USB stick and know the computer lab's night hours...Hard core.

- You're going to get into more bands and music than you've ever known. Don't be close-minded about your music. There's some great stuff out there.

- Ask questions in class. You're paying to be there.

- Don't wait until the night before to do a ten page paper.

- You're friends are right down the hall. That can be the best or worst thing in the world.

- Learn to say you're sorry and admit when you're wrong. It takes a really big person to do that.

- Go to church every Sunday. I know you don't have to, no one is making you...But do it. Your spiritual well-being depends on it. If you can find someone as into their faith as you are yours, awesome! Keep them close, pray with them, talk to them about your faith...Not many other people can, will, or want to do that with you. If you get involved with campus ministry or even a local church, those people will find you and you'll find them.

- You don't know everything.

- You don't have to love your roommate, you just have to live with them.

- Get to know your teachers. They're really cool PEOPLE...Not just god's who stand at a blackboard three times a week. If you google them, you'll find books they've written and research they've conducted. It's pretty darn spiffy.

- Denny's and Eat'N'Park are open all night. Take advantage of that.

- spontaneous road trips are fantastic. Go on them.

- Try to get six hours of sleep a night...Please? You'll just function better.

- Surprise someone with something nice. Do a random act of kindness. It may be the only good thing that happens to that person that day.

- You'll get writers block. Walk away from whatever you're doing for an hour and then come back to try again.

- You ARE cut out for college. You wouldn't be there if you weren't.

- Take yourself seriously. If YOU don't, no one else will.

- Exercise. Not insanely or fanatically...But just an hour three times a week is better than never.

- You are not 'in it' alone. You're with hundreds of other freshman and thousands of former freshman. Don't stress out.

- Do laundry. For God's sake, do laundry.

- If you lend stuff out, be careful who you give it to. You may never see it again.

- Don't cheat.

- Bring your stuffed animal with you.

- Get three to ten hugs a day.





Well, that's what I've got. Feel free to ask questions or add your own.

HAPPY EASTER!

*starts singing*

Jesus is life, yeaaah, woooah-oooh-oh-oh! The air I'm breathin', why my heart is beatin'...Jesus is liiiife.

(Name that tune)

And leave a sprited comment full of...spirit!

At least I know I'm going about the whole major thing correctly...or so this online quiz told me!

You scored as Theater. You should be a Theater major! Like a bohemian actress, you are seasoned and confident and not afraid to express yourself! Theater 100% Art 83% Dance 83% English 83% Sociology 83% Journalism 75% Philosophy 67% Linguistics 50% Anthropology 50% Mathematics 33% Psychology 33% Biology 25% Engineering 17% Chemistry 17% What is your Perfect Major? (PLEASE RATE ME!!<3) created with QuizFarm.com

From the LiveJornal of the beautiful and faithful Sarah!

Put your music player on random, and ask these following questions, press next when you've finished each question and fill it out. NO CHEATING.

(I'm using my ITunes on Party Shuffle.)

Song - Artist.

How does the world see me?:
Without Love – Hairspray Original Broadway Cast Recording

(Wow, really?)

Will I have a happy life?:
One Week – Bare Naked Ladies

(Better than never!)

Do people secretly lust after me?:
One Angry Dwarf and 200 Solemn Faces –Ben Folds Five

(That doesn't even make sense)

How can I make myself happy?:
Disenchanted Lullaby – Foo Fighters

(Interesting)

What should I do with my life?:
Testimony – Scott Free/ EV music

(Rock on! :-D)

Will I ever have children?:
Fallible – Blues Travelers

(No one's kids are perfect, though)

What is some good advice for me?
Everything is Alright – Motion City Soundtrack

(Thank heavens!)

How will I be remembered?:
Seasons of Love – Rent Broadway Musical Cast Recording

(That's pretty sweet)

What is my signature dancing song?:
Act 1 “Dear Reader…” – How To Succeed In Business Without Really Trying (The New Broadway Cast) Recording

(That doesn't fit...then again, I can't dance so maybe it does)

What do I think my current theme song is?:
Gone for Good – The Shins

(I like it, but I'm not sure what it means/how it pertains to my life)

What does everyone else think my current theme song is?:
Roxanne – The Police

(Only half sure about this one, too)

What song will play at my funeral?:
I’m Not Wearing Underwear Today – Avenue Q Original Broadway Cast Recording

(I laughed out loud for this one)

What type of men/women do you like?:
The Likes of You Again – Flogging Molly

(Holy Inaccuracy!)

What is my day going to be like?:
Matter of Time - Cartel

(Oy...my day was better than that!)



Anyone have an opinion of what song describes me best?

And in the news today!

A few random accounts of life and living.

• I'm an RA. Surprise! I have my own room! Hurrah!!!! Yay! Rock on. Fun times! No, really, I like it a lot. I'm with a great staff who are becoming really good friends to me. I'm learning a whole heck of a lot and enjoying every minute of it. I can't wait to do my programs!

• I was casted in Golganooza. It's a play festival that is student written, directed, and acted in. It's free to all who want to see it. There are four shows this year and all of them are hilarious. I was one of three girls chosen - what an honor! I hope I can live up to all that will be expected of me. I'll just do my best. We'll see what happens, but with great talent like Andy and Kevin, they're bound to make me look good. The creative directing talents of Josh and the humor written by Brandon: it's just a great blend. Oh! And it's the first Golganooza musical ever! Rock on.

• someonekissedmetonight.andikissedback.

• I've been reading a lot of good plays lately. It's a fun time. I end up reading for leisure and then not doing my school work. I'm not terribly behind, but I'm not on top of things ,either. I just keep doing what I can, even though it's not always my best work. I really do love reading, and it's a shame one doesn't have more time to do it in college. There are too many teachers assigning text book pages instead of really GOOD books.

• My aunt passed away. :(

• So my friends threw me a surprise party. A big one. It was a facebook party, too. It said:

'She's sweet, she's kind, she's talented, and she's 19. Help us celebrate the waning teenage days of everyone's little bit of Italian joy, Michelina! RSVP as soon as possible if you can. Talk to Kevin or Paige, write, call, send up a smoke signal, morse code, something. She'll be there at 8, so get there reasonably earlier than that. We hope to see you there! Michelina sure does. Well she would, heh, you know ... if she knew you were coming.'

I was shocked. Totally floored. I couldn't believe it. I was very happy. I think I was too surprised to cry. They decorated Hickory's lobby and had a huge cake and everyone was there! Residents, staff, theatre kids, Hemmy hall kids, llc kids...the list goes on and on. I was supposed to be on duty, but I had rehearsal and Kate took over for me for the first hour. I came back and saw the lights were off in the lobby. I remembered an RC was doing a program. I saw the lights on in the wings, so I thought 'they blew a fuse, the power went out, I'm supposed to be on duty, and this was one of my questions when I was interviewed, I need to find Liz...' I voiced this concern to Kevin, who said 'well, I'm coming in with you to see what's going on'. Ok. Walk in: BAM! Holy crap. Amazing.

THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH. I am so blessed with friends.

• I! Am going to watch Reefer Madness 'the movie musical' now. Good night :)

Tattoo, Red Lion Rent, and Little Known Holiday Super Bowl Fun

Tattoo

On Tuesday, January 31st (my friend Jessica, who I've known since preschool ... Wow, fifteen years is a long time to know somebody) - I went to Matthews Party tattoos and Piercing Parlor ... And got a tattoo. It's a rose, it's about two inches big, and it's on my lower back. I LOVE it. I was very concerned for two big reasons:

1. NO ONE in my family knows (except for my cousin, who I told after having it for five hours...He lives in CA and promises not to spill)

2. I was scared it would hurt like hell.

I think the only thing I could say (and I said it repeatedly) before I got there were 'So. I'm getting a tattoo. And my mother doesn't know. And it's going to hurt like hell...' Everyone would say 'yup'. Katie and Kaitlin and Amanda went with me. Amanda actually came into the back room with me (only one person could go) and held my hands. I think I crushed her a little. It hurt, but not nearly as bad as I thought it would. And it's pretty. And simple. And something just for me. Hurrah! After I got it I had this conversation:

Kevin: Is this the only one you're getting?
Me: ahahaha yes
Kevin: Sometimes people get a rose, then they get addicted, then the rose becomes a garden, then the garden is met by a cottage, then it's in the mountains, and before you know it you're a walking Kinkaid painting.

Right. No Kinkaid coming anytime soon.

Red Lion Rent

Three of my friends here at school live in a small town near York called Red Lion. I heard about it a lot, I like the small town idea. I'm the kind of person who can live in a really big city or a really secluded area - but Suburbia is stifling. I wake up on Friday morning to see that I have gotten an instant message from a friend of mine who lives there and already had gone home for the weekend. It pretty much said that I needed to find a way to get my Italian butt out to Red Lion because Penn State York was hosting the Broadway Touring Cast of Rent. Rent's creator, Jonathan Larson started a tradition called 'Rush Tickets'. Two hours before curtain goes up, people can buy tickets for $20. And these aren't for the crappy seats - rush tickets are the first two rows specifically reserved for those who buy rush seats. Only two per person, and 32 seats saved ... That's amazing, yes, but difficult to get. In NY people line up the day before for them. The only thing stopping me from jumping in the car with Kaitlin and going to the Eastern side of the state was my mother, who was planning on coming to visit me here at school this past weekend. Being the considerate daughter I am, I called her in an attempt to ask if we could change our plans. She took it as my asking her permission to go on this excursion...Meaning I needed to tell her:

1. Who I was staying with (Kaitlin)
2. What kind of car she drives
3. What year the make was
4. How long she had been driving
5. How many siblings she had (no, I'm not kidding.)
6. What her home phone number was
7. And address
8. Social security number, drivers license, and resume

Maybe I'm exaggerating that last one a little bit. But just a little. After running around trying to contact my mom, Kaitlin, my mom, my mom, Kaitlin...I was almost allowed to go (which, I didn't ask my mother because I wanted permission, I was just trying to make sure I could change our plans), until mom insisted on talking to Kaitlin's mom. This was difficult since both of our mother's were working. After packing my suitcase while Kaitlin and Jesse (who was coming along for the ride) sat there waiting for my mom to call back and listening to me swear and decided that I was going with or without permission...I finally got the ok. So we hopped in the car and listened to Rent and I was QUITE excited.

I got to eat at Central Pizza - good stuff, and see how Kaitlin's family owned half the town, and a million other fun things. It's cool because they all grew up with each other. Kaitlin's family was having a get together for someone's birthday and all of us went over to say hello. It was hilarious, a lot of discussion about our future professions, computers, if I was an Italian Jew...Yeah. Good times.

The next day, Kevin and I went to sheetz, grabbed rations, and then took our food, our homework, and ourselves over to PSU York. We waited in line for about 8 hours. We took a huge Rent poster that was hanging up, because we were so early that no one was there yet and I really wanted it. It's hanging in my room!!! Then! Kevin left me in line because he had to go get a new laptop (he spilled some hobo jug wine on it - yeah they hippies try to make their own wine. Long story short, liquid in a computer doesn't work) , when this guy who's the director of the university theatre walked in and asked how long I had been in line, I told him an hour and a half and that the building was beautiful (it's only 6 months old) and I had never been there before. He asks if I want to see inside, so he unlocks it and lets me in and it's beautiful! Then he leaves and I ask the stage manager who's walking around where the actors leave the theatre and sign autographs after the show. She tells me, and Kevin comes back, and since no one is around STILL we go looking for it. WELL! Somehow we go through a wrong door and we end up BACKSTAGE!!!!!!! We're walking through and I'm trying not to have a freaking heart attack, so I keep looking around and it's awesome! I saw the costumes and the dressing room, and a bunch of people were working on stuff for the night's show but no one stopped us. So we walk all through backstage, no one bothers us - again, incredible! We finally ask how to get out to the main part of the building. Someone shows us and then when they're gone I FREAK OUT because we were backstage of RENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!And it was amazing. *phew*

So! Then we get in line and get our tickets, I go back to Kaitlin's, shower real fast,and we get there just in time to see it start. Kevin's mom came with us, she's really sweet. Our seats were Orchestra Pit Very First Row CENTER!!!! The show starts and the whole first act my jaw is pretty much on the floor and I'm smiling and it's amazing. During intermission I realized my face hurt from smiling so much, haha. Then the second act, Seasons of Love starts and I'm crying because it's really pretty and the guy playing Angel is standing right in front of me and so is the guy playing Roger. And they're BOTH singing right to me and smiling at me, but especially Angel. So I'm melting into a puddle in my seat thinking: 'oooooooh my gosh' . That was pretty cool. The whole second act was amazing, I cried for half of it. After the funeral scene I was sobbing really hard. Just - wow. Then at the end for the curtain call and such, Angel is in front of me again and he's smiling at me and it's fantastic.

Then! We run to where the actors are supposed to come out, and we're told it'll be a few because they're in a meeting. So Kevin goes to tell his mom we have to wait and as soon as he leaves the actors come out. Of course, right? I get all of their signatures, tell them it was the first time I saw it on stage, they were great, etc. And then Angel comes out and I was like 'can I have a quick autograph?' And he says 'Sure' and he looks at me and goes 'Oh! YOU were my favorite tonight'. And I was like 'really? Thank you so much,thank you, you were great' and he says 'no, thank YOU for giving me so much energy to do the second half of the show!' and I almost died. So he wrote 'keep beautiful michelina' in my program!!!!! AMAZING!!!!! So Sunday night I google-ed the guy and emailed him and I hope he writes back.

That's my Rent experience. Now, the freshman trip is to see it in NY and I'm in the drawing to go - they pick names on Monday night. Hopefully I'll be chosen, It would be such a blessing -the trip is only $50 and that's very cheap considering...I'd never have a change to go for such little money again.

Little Known holiday Super Bowl Fun

So the Steelers were in the Super Bowl. The game wasn't as exciting as I thought, though I didn't my fair share of yelling. The Rolling Stones were the half time show, and we thought it would be good -but no: lame. By the middle of the third quarter I was getting tired of it, no good new commercials, no good plays... So what do I do? I write all the random little known holidays for the next few months on the wall calendar by Chris's computer. His birthday was national hug day and something about granola? He was fated to be a hippie. Since the Steelers won, not many people went to school at my loving NA school district, so Dr. Green the most obnoxious and strict superintendent on the face of the planet - gave everyone the Tuesday off because the NA marching band was playing downtown. Haha, by little brother still had to get up early to go and play his fluty fluteness in Pittsburgh. Ah well, it was probably cool. Bandies. Good times. I still had to go to class, although Professor Webb did cancel Theory and Ear Training.


That's about where my story ends. *golf claps*

HEY MICKEY YOU'RE SO FINE, YOU'RE SO FINE YOU BLOW MY MIND!

There are only three people in the entire world who can call me any variation of the name 'Mickey'.

The first is Scott. He started it last year when we were dating. To us, we were 'Miccy and Scotty'. But only to us. At first I wasn't sure how I felt about it, but now I relish in it. Even though we're just friends now, he's like a little brother and I love him to death. It's really funny how some people are just made to be friends. The shortest relationship I ever had ended the best way. He's a good kid with a huge amount of creative ability. Talking to him today, I found out he's going to be a secondary ed English major. That totally blew me away, but it fits him - thinking about it now. Pretty nifty how that works out. That child is goin' places.

Ali. I don't talk to her anymore. We sung in childrens choir at church about eight years ago. Since she was 'Ali', I suppose I naturally became 'Micki'. I was three years her senior and that was okay with us. Somehow we were still formed a special bond. Four years after the children's choir was long past, and she was trying out for Star Search while I kept up theater arts...She told me about her plans for suicide. I remember being very 'good' about it all. Sat down with our Youth Minister, talked, prayed, explained. I was strong and attentive and sensitive and as mature as possible for a sixteen year old hearing a friend would rather die. When I was finally dropped off at my own house, I broke down. The most frightening thing I had to experience was having the knowledge of someone's destiny resting (seemingly) on my shoulders.

The last would be Father Al Semler. He was the first parish priest I had when I moved from Philadelphia to the Pittsburgh area. He held my attention and started to get me interested in church. It's incredible what one person can do. He always called me Mickey and when he was re-assigned by the diocese, I remember being heartbroken. It taught me a good lesson in trusting God though, things that were good just keep getting better. He trained me as an alter server, too. Great stuff.

I don't like the nickname when most people call me it...It's obnoxious. I'm not a cartoon character, as much as I love Disney. But there are always certain people who can bend the rules.

Trading Stories

So my friend and I exchanged sentences and then used them to write stories for each other. The first one is mine to my friend, then the line is the divider, the second one is my friend's to me. We're cool like this. Here it goes.

____________________________________________________________
"Blessed up and down but never satiated," he muttered under her breath. He wasn't listening, he rarely ever did. She continued to chatter about all of her problems and her life and her world, as though it was the only one that ever existed. She was so self centered -- self righteous, really. The way she claimed to have faith, but rarely showed it and then hated herself for it. The different times she was seeking attention by talking about things no one wanted to hear about in the first place. That's what she was doing right now. He couldn't stand it, if it wasn't for the fact that he was totally and completely captivated by her spirit.

The thing about her is that she hates being one of those people who doesn't practice what she preaches. But something is stopping her from being who she wants to be. Whoever that is. He started to put away the dishes as she dried them with the dishtowl that had the cherries printed on it. They matched the rest of the kitchen's red and white theme. The checkered curtains and the deep brown wooden table with it's picnic benches' were drenched in sunlight. The one sided chatter continued and he threw in an occasional 'mmhm', 'right', 'I know'...hoping she wouldn't notice his lack of utmost attention. His thoughts wandered, 'What would it be like to marry this girl?' He never would, mind you, but he wondered about it.

Where was life going? What direction would they take? Together or separate. It would be so much easier to see things laid out for them. Blessed up and down but never satiated. What did it take to show her how amazingly lucky she was? The world is full of people who can't see what's right in front of their eyes because they're too busy looking into the future or pondering the past. Instead of worrying about it all, get down on your knees more often. If she was so worried about it why didn't she pray more? Why don't any of us start praying more?

Blessed up and down but never satiated, God answers every prayer but doesn't always say 'yes'. The clouds started to cover the sun and the dishes were finished. He kissed her on the nose and asked if she'd join him for a walk. They went down the drive and dark clouds rolled across the sky. They were having a rare moment of silence. When they reached the top of the hill, the rain fell from weeping heavens and the ran for cover. He screamed a deep throated yell and picked her up. She tickled him and he threw his light spring jacket around her shoulders as they sprinted across the street. It was the kind of rain that is so sudden and hard and warm that you just want to look up and spin in a circle until you can throw yourself down into a field of grass. They pulled open the door of the first building they found and her glorious laughter rang and echoed.

Instinctively, he glanced over his shoulder. Empty. "It's been a long time. Why didn't I come here sooner?" she asked quietly, staring at him hard. He gently held her hands and lead her into a pew. They kneeled down and she started to cry, something about the incredible miracles and gifts and faith that were here and the fact that she ignors it always hit her soul. Blessed up and down but never satiated, "I'm not good enough," she whispered. He dried her tears and said "No one is. Just say 'thank you'."

____________________________________________________________

It had the potential to be beautiful. Well, rather 'he' than 'it' I suppose. No need in degrading it any farther, now is there? No, not really, but he's been suffering that type of objectification since the beginning. His father-not having a good beat bag to let loose into after work (his mother being deceased since forty-eight)-he was a smart man and he figured a way to fill the gap. Can't hear shit from the neighbors house if either of you have the windows shut, and here in Fargo, everyone does.

To see him at seventeen he's the same character. A real quiet kind of guy a real hand in pocket kind of guy, he'd never been too active with women. Never could read the faces and the moods quite the way the most of us can, so he'd never been too active with women, even to the point of his sexuality coming to question, but he didn't care enough to point it, no one cared nearly as much as him. This was still sufficient motive to justify the thrown stones from the churchyard. Wait, what do they say? In Fargo, everybody does.

Now the point of this whole mess isn't to ramble for most of this page on the nature of parental and phallic love, but to tell the entire story of his first romance. After a brief episode near the church, an episode I will not delve here because only he and the girl were there, and they chose to forget it entirely, he'd come to fancy a girl, and her him. A good thing really, but a nervous thing. A nervous thing on which he spent the customary (customary to an experienced creature of habit like her) three day period of silence after the initial expression of mutual affection pondering the possibilities.

Where is she? Has she fallen for someone else? Was it a lie? And as the guilty questioning turns to fearful proclamation. I'm very forgettable. My father would never like her. I'm not good for me, I can't be good for her? She's gone. On and on into the night and the day and the night and the day and the night and the morning of the eventual confrontation. She approached him with a poorly masked smile, compassionate towards the jaded and lonesome looking man before her. "Where is the glitter form your eye?" she asked him passionately. And he walked away, a forgotten man.