Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Wating for the Next Big Thing

Waiting For The Next Big Thing

I’m from the North Hills, which is twenty minutes or so outside of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. It is suburbia, folks, and you can’t get away from it. It is not the country, but definitely not the city either. And at age nineteen, I am stuck here like a piece of chewing gum in my little brother’s hair. It can be pretty, the grass and the trees and the strip malls. But one tends to get bored easily, so I rely on my ‘people-watching’ abilities. I know you have heard of ‘bird-watching’, so I can compare ‘people-watching’ to ‘bird-watching’. I sit down in a restaurant, a store, on a bench, in a public restroom, and notice how people act. I hear amazing love stories and horrible tragedies. I meet a bunch of people that have no story, besides the one I supply. You would be amazed at the type of inhabitants of this area.


I was in Starbucks yesterday, and I was going about my people-watching, as usual. Behind me was a group of middle school students who were enjoying a celebratory breakfast with their classmates before the last day of school.


“And then SHE said to me that it didn’t matter what we did so long as we did it, and I told her she better chill because it’s the last week of school and then she retracted her claws!”


The group of three girls and one boy laughed. A second boy joined the group and was greeted with a ‘hey, hottie!’ He wasn’t that attractive. I was watching these thirteen-year-olds sitting around, putting up their masks and pretending they were greater and more secure than they really were. When the parental units entered the scene, reminding them of their commitment to one final day of school before three months of freedom – the seventh graders blushed with embarrassment. How dare their mother act like she KNOWS her son and his friends? How embarrassing. Total social suicide. What a way to start the summer.


The business men on the couch next to them hardly noticed the mother’s social blunder. “It’s hard,” the thirty-something man in a navy blue suit explains to his elder, who dawns a gray blazer. After a sympathetic nod, the younger man continued, “this constant hiding and lying and denying that there is anything wrong. You would think someone would come up with a ‘no strings attached’ system for carrying on an affair.” The older man stared at him long and hard before asking in a quiet voice, “are you breaking up with me?”


A loud crash from the display table made the father of a sweet looking imp, cringe. He dragged his daughter, who looked to be just under schooling age, up to the front with one hand, while holding the remains of a broken mug in the other. “Hand the nice lady the money, Olivia.” His impatience could not be masked by his sweet tone. Olivia started to cry and her father handed the cashier the money himself. He bought her a cookie, told her accidents happen, and at least there was no hot coffee in the cup like the LAST time she broke one. She laughed and hopped onto her father for a piggyback ride to the car.


There was one lone girl, who was almost a woman, sitting by herself at one of those very small round tables that barely fits two people, but Starbucks tries anyway, just to make it look like there is more seating. The result is a cluttered look, more than anything. She watched everything around her, and was taking mental notes. She was bored to tears and sucked into the other people’s lives that she had been watching, all at the same time. She drank an over-priced ice coffee, and looked as though she was waiting for the next big thing. No one spoke to her, though she made eye contact with everyone. They could feel her nonchalant stare. She should have been out having her own life, instead of living vicariously through others just to write it down later. Everyone sees her quietly observing their lives and no one speaks to her, no one invites her in, and no one knows why she is there. I know why she is there. She is there to build a character for a role she will play on stage some day. She is there to gain writing material. She is there to learn about her surroundings in ways others care not to. They know where they live, they wave hello to their neighbor, and never know their children’s teachers. She does not want to become that. She wants to know the people that live around her so personally, she could finish their sentences. She wants them to read this, and see that they are noticed. She wants to break the mold.


And all the while, these caffeine consuming, time managing, private lives citizens of the North Hills, just twenty minutes outside of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, assume it’s just another day around town.

Thursday, June 01, 2006

Old Letters And New Characters

I found this old letter to my fifth grade teacher. Her name is Mrs. Barbara Link and she was so cool. No one liked her, and she scared me, and one day I messed up a science project where you had to tape two ends of 2 lt. soda bottles together and plant seeds in one end and put air holes in the other...I put holes in both of my halves and thought there was no reparing it. I wrote her a note that said I messed it up, and please don't tell my mom. She wrote me a note back saying during recess I should talk to her. She helped me fix it and then I wrote her and she wrote me back whenever I needed to tell her something but was too scared. She really was a nice lady. Apparently, one day she tripped and fell on her stairs and slipped a disk. So her and I started writing back and forth, and in my ten-year-old mind I thought I was so cool, getting mail from someone older than me. Anyway, I lost her address when we moved from Philidealphia to Pittsburgh. I guess this letter never got into the mail.

Date: May 22, 1998
Dear Mrs. Link,
Hi! I have this strange feeling that all my letters have gotten lost on there way to you and they are half way across China by now. If you do however, get this letter by some miracle please write back! If for some reason, you can't, dictate to someone and get them to mail it for you! Now that I got that out o the way, today was Field Day today, and today was the hoop-off! I was on the white team. The score was 243 to 241. White only lost by two points! WAAAAAAA! It was so close. I made it to the Hoop-Off. Laura McC , Jessica H, an d I stood next to each other. Jess fell after 15 min. I felt so bad. Me and Laura (oops), Laura and I did allot of things while we were hooping, we said the Rosaries, TWICE! we saw a blimp that said 'Metlife' and Snoopy was on it! My knees hurts so much that I got down on my knees and hooped a the same time! Laura and I didn't drop our hoops when it was time, we flung are selves on the ground! I thought I'd never get up, but I did. Laura an d i won, there were 280 kids that started and 47 that made it through the hole thing, and Laura and I made it 47 instead of 45. I feel so happy to know I counted, literally!
Are you coming to the talent show and / or the 5th grade graduation? Pleeeeeeeeeease say yes. Well, what are you waiting for? Come on all you have to say is Y-E-S! We sold are house. We are moving out of are house on the 31st of July. Here is my new address:
- - - - Claridon Drive
- - - s Pa
1- - - -
I'm almost out of room! I will type as much more as I can. We had Young Author's Day. My illustration won for the front cover!!!!!!!!!!!! I was / am so excited. I don't want my computer to get mad at me so I'll have to cut it short.
Hope to hear from you soon,
Michelina
P.S.
My dad got a new Pontiac Grand Prix! It's black!
So I'm workin gin an assisted living home. I have been there a week now. I'm learning a lot about myself and others, I like working with other people (since I'm a people-person), I love to hear the residents stories, and I can pick my hours. However, it's twelve hour shifts (7am-7pm) and it's five days a week - sixty hours! The pay is decent, and I have things I need to start saving for, so that's a plus. But it's hard work. I have to help serve food, bathe, change diapars, answer call buttons, dress, and make sure there is no escaping of the residents. There are three units. The 'main level' (you're not allowed to say 'upstairs' because it's demeaning to those 'downstairs') is for people who can dress themselves, know what's going on basically, and are pretty coherent. The 'garden level' has two seperate units. 'Frail' is for those who are physically unable to do what they used to be able to do, and sometimes their minds aren't the best either. 'P.C.' or 'Politely Confused' is for those who's body is still functioning pretty well, but their minds are a little lost. Ok, a lot lost. P.C. is the most isolated unit, and if you go there, you're there alone. One staff person and 12 residents and three exits to watch. The only goot thing is that the doors have alarms and codes and anytime a door opens you have to type in the code to shut off the alarm. It's pretty high tech, I have to get my fingerprint scanned to clock in and out of work.
I had worked in Frail (where there are two staff members down there at a time) as well as Main level, again, two people. And then on Sunday, the supervisor sends me to P.C. -- that's a death sentence. She said the night crew person would tell me what to do and if I could do Main, I could do P.C. Fine. I go and the night crew person writes where everyone's room is, who's violent and not, who needs what kind of diapers, who tries to run...And then she leaves me. And I am all alone with twelve residents. All day, these people hear and see ghosts of their past. Some more than others. For three days I spoke nonsense and lies, and it was not easy. It's very sad, they beg me to let them leave, they want to know where they are, when they're going home, and they ask why I am doing this to them. I started to write down some of what I could.
Joan
I met Joan. Joan doesn't know what's going on. She points and speaks about things that aren't there, asks me questions about who knows what, and sees me as someone she knows or once knew. She constantly looks at me after complimenting me and then says "are you staying? you need to stay, you and your sisters NEVER stay long, I only see you once a year..."
"I couldn't find her." "That's okay, she'll be back tomorrow." "Is he alright?" "Yes." "You're beautiful, God you're beautiful." "You're beautiful, too." "I love your dress." "Thank you." "You're beautiful." "Thank you, so are you." "You don't have to be, you're so good.""Thank you." "I have to go to school." "It's Saturday, the teachers won't be there." "They're coming up nicely." "I think so."
Bill
Bill is a war vet. The other day he told me he was dying and that he was shot 'yesterday' and he was dying and needed to see a doctor right away. He said he was bleeding everywhere. I told him that was sixty-some years ago, and he's fine now. Apparently he was shot three times and he still has a bullet in his head. He called me a dumb something or other for not believing him and serving food like nothing was the matter.
"Do you work?" "Yes, I work here." "Here?" "here?" "Yes." "Oh." "And I like the theatre, I'm an actress." "Are you? What one?" "What show am I in? ...*pause to make something up* My Fair Lady." "Did they give you the sweater already?" "Yes...so are you going to sit down for me at the dinner table, now?" "No kiddin?" "No, no kidding. :-) " "I want you to know, for your information, I don't have my drivers license." "Ok, I'll keep that in mind, thanks for making me aware." "I told you I can't drive! I'm 93 years old! I drove to mass and shut off the ignition in the parking lot and that was it." "Wow. That's amazing." "The carnival's on KDKA now, just started." "What are you doing now?" "Whoever I can." "Oh."
He was coloring with us, I kept hit picture. He just wrote:
"The liffof I I Rifof didn't I Do I do not driv Seve"
Joe
Joe is the most violent. Joan likes to hold hands with anyone who will hold hers, and you have to watch that Joe doesn't hold her hand, because he'll squeeze until he crushes it and he gets very angry and fustrated. He doesn't speak often but when he does...well, he's a funny guy.
"No, no, Joe, you can't go out there." *run to the door*"Is that the flight?" "Yeah." "Oh." "But it's closed now." "oh, is it?" "Yes." "really?" "They told me so." "Oh." "Sorry." "That's alright." "Maybe tomorrow." "Okay." "Let's go back." "Alright then."
***
"Please let go of her hand." "I told you we can't pay you!" "This isn't the right one. (Joan)" "Now, I mean it!" "Joe, please let go, you're hurting her" "I KNOW I AM!" "This one is better." "I'm calling the supervisor." "JOE, LET GO OF HER! (supervisor)." "Come here, Joan, sweetie." "JOE, LET GO OF HER." *tears hands apart* *Joe raises his hand to strike me* "Don't. You. Dare."
It's interesting.